Get outta my car

According to an article in Variety, there is serious talk of bringing back Knight Rider.

Now, Knight Rider was one of my favorite shows in the 80s. Since I got my driver’s license, it’s held even more appeal because, hey, who wouldn’t like to have a car that could drive itself–let alone one that is nigh invulnerable? Sure it didn’t stick the last two times they’ve tried to bring it back (first with the lame TV movie Knight Rider 2000 and then with the wildly unsuccessful syndicated Team Knight Rider–and I just found out about the travesty that was Knight Rider 2010, never even heard of that before). But with the right twist and team behind it, it could work now, right?

I think it could.

Except if you read the article what they’re actually talking about is kind of ridiculous. They want to do a “‘Transformers’-inspired re-working of the 1980s hit action-drama series.” That’s right, they want KITT to transform into a giant robot and fight other evil giant robots.

I’m not doubting that a series like that could work, but why bother calling it “Knight Rider” when it’s actually “Transformers” (or, maybe, “Go Bots”)? Aside from the supposedly cheaper licensing fees.

Look, if you’re going to do a new version of Knight Rider, do it right. It requires three things:

1. A slick car. Preferably one that has a lot in common with a sporty one you can buy, but with a few extra things–like an AI with a bit of a condescending attitude and combat-ready options.
2. A person with a shady past who’s turning over a new leaf. I’m open to it being a woman. Amnesia is optional, but always a good plot device.
3. A sponsoring organization that is well-funded and well-connected. Make it a bit ambiguous as to who’s interests it actually serves and you’ve got plot for at least a season.

That gives a production or creative team a whole lot of leeway. And it doesn’t even exclude giant robots. Just don’t start out with them. Build your own damn brand and don’t ride on the coat tails of the current hot film. By the time you actually get the show made, those coat tails will be dusty and the coat will be so over-worn no one will care any more.